Upon reaching down town Angel Grove, I greeted by the ugly male hag of an evil doer. He shook my hand claiming honor,
But he was actually introducing my body to his lethal weapon known as feather in your cap juice.



Instantly I was transformed into fearsome warrior whose only alliance laid with Brad.  Brad began to cackle at the
sight of his evil plan unfolding, he taking advantage of my current slave like disposition forced me to escort his
daughter to homecoming.


I did as I was instructed but while on stage someone proposed and love was the only serum available that
neutralizes Brad's effects on me, using the love in the air, I began breathing until I was set free from his evil
control. In order to hide from Brad so that he could never shake my hand again, I went to a protection agency.
They gave me a new identity, Tom Tuckins, International Cinemax Soft core Porn Star. With this new identity I
forged a clause in my contract that I never had to be in any of my own scenes, and despite this I became
quite popular in the soft core world.  Soon others followed my trend but sadly it simply created a sub-genre
of soft core pornography, Invisibilornography. Actual actors were no longer needed for scenes, only voice actors.


So because of this I was soon put out of a job and forced to whore myself to anamorphic reindeer's, but not whore
in the literal sense. I simply was paid to take suggestive pictures with them in order to make Elk and other male
reindeer's jealous so they would appreciate what they had at home.


One night at work I showed up to the wrong house and was bitten by a member of fictional
cop duo Miami Vice. I became a Rico Wolf but I soon grew lonely. So I bit somebody else
and for some reason they became the other guy from Miami Vice.


We sat around for a while playing cards until my hair grew out and then we took it to the streets. Life was tough.
Our guns were orange. We were the law and we loved it. But one thing conflicted. My dream of being a lounge singer.




One day while on a beat I accidentally shot the wrong guy and my partner died. So I just kinda left and went into the nearest
lounge I could and picked up the microphone. A big shot record producer was present and offered me a deal, but only if I joined
his newly formed boy band group.


And thus the THREE MUSKETEERS were born. We haven't recorded anything yet but we have taken plenty of promotional pictures.

The End